Gender is Stupid
I’m beginning to think gender is just stupid, y’all — for realz!
I was talking to a budding acquaintance (with whom I’ve grown fairly intimate) who is also trans, about the struggles of defying gender and difficulty explaining what is happening in our brains about our own..blah blah. The topic turned to Michigan’s adding an “X” gender marker option on state ID’s. We recognized the progress in it, but also understood the implications of an “X” which was the signature of people who could not write even their own name. It is also used to strike something off a list. I was struck with the full on of it—all if it. The data collected about gender (and a lot of other basic traits) offers zero information about the person. Really, go in deep and think it through.
Let’s go through the list:
Appearance: A person’s gender tells us zero about what a person looks like. There are women built like NFL line-backers (trust me, I’m dating one at the moment). There are so-called men who have soft skin, high voices and child-bearing hips.
Behavior: What someone checks off as one of the limited options allotted for gender, tells Jack shit how a person will dress, walk, what speech inflections they will use, gestures, or responses to stimuli.
Orientation: Do I have to go into this one? Suffice it to say, no M or F will limit Who a person wants to get it on (or off) with. There are also more than two options when selecting potential partners (including how many at a time!)
Preferences: I’m gonna include clothing, hobbies, entertainment, and occupations. Gender won’t tell us anything about what a person desires. It doesn’t let us in on the aesthetics that attract a person.
Abilities: I’m willing to bet that if you disagree that gender doesn’t indicate a person’s skills or aptitude, you stopped reading my shit a long time ago. Otherwise, you likely accept that at face value, or won’t comment.
I could keep going. The list of possibilities go on and on and none of them reliably indicated by gender, regardless of how and when it was assigned. It might be true that society imposes expectations, society sucks when it comes to who is allowed to do what (not based on law, but on social rewards and sanctions.) Cross your arms all you want, but you’d likely unknot them with quickness if you found yourself in a room with Lavern Cox or Elliot Page.
Replace gender with other data points routinely collected, that don’t tell shit. We assign expectations based on race, able-bodiedness, first language, faith, wealth, country of origin, income bracket and on and on. We (yes, you too!) carry prejudices and beliefs we wouldn’t speak to someone of that group. We keep in check knowing we’ll be called out ( or canceled) for voicing our ignorance (not and indictment). Collecting this data is useful for keeping us in the little boxes the ruling class needs us in so they can live their chosen reality. Studying this data to see social impacts on individuals well-being, otherwise the information is most likely a tool of marginalization. Tell me, please, if I got this wrong.
